Michelle

I have a new home. It's a one bedroom and den. I bought the place two years ago before I went back to school. It is finally finished. I took possession last Saturday.( Check it out. )

My first purchase for my new place is a 46” flat screen TV. Yes, I know my priorities. Plus, I get free internet for a year as a promotion for my new place. Yay!

Michelle

Embarrassing moment of the day: Today, I tried to be sneaky and printed an e-book from work. I forgot to look which printer the computer I am using prints out of. I was hiding in a corner trying to print it out when it printed in the nursing station at our ward. :X

Last night, the gang and I went to see Del Shores speak. He's so funny and thoughtprovoking and it was a very pleasant evening. He talked about his work on Sordid Lives (of course) and Southern Babtist Sissies (duh!) and he told funny celebrity stories about Rue McClanahan, Courtney Love and Dolly Parton. The event was at the small theater within the KD Studios in Dallas, "where's the local actors come from." George Eads has his grin plastered on a wall there, and signed it with "people more awesome than me." Oh, George.

Michelle

Britney was in Vancouver last night. After the show has started and long silence from the stage, it was announced the show wouldn’t continue if the “smokers” wouldn’t stop smoking. Then at the end of the show, Britney said this:

Michelle

Currently, Tron 2.0 is filming at night on my way to the train from work. It sounds like an updated 80’s version of the original movie from what my former co-worker says about the costume fitting her son did as an extra for the film. So far, all I’ve seen are the film crew setting up and one guy on top of a taxicab about to be filmed. Nothing exciting to see.

What I am excited about is the opening of Cupcakes on the way to work. They’re these specialty cupcakes, which are rich in fat but so delicious. Yum! Everybody at work is on diet and they only want to eat the minis. Bah. I am eating the cupcake size for breakfast.

Michelle

Remember Nsyncgrrl? Who knew after all these years she'd be a successful fiction writer? Of course, she's rewritten most of her Nsync fic into original fiction stories. She’s listed them here. She also rewrote Original Sin. Her latest is Tee'd Off l which I recall was originally a Chris and Justin fic. Looking at her website, I find myself playing “name that fic”. Seriously though, kudos to her for being a successful writer. I’m even tempted to get an autographed book from her. Maybe, this one where one of characters gets superpowers from his lover’s semen. ;)

Keith Olbermann was on fire tonight! All the way into Rachel Maddow's time slot. I thought (and secretly hoped) he'd never stop. ETA: So good that I had to watch it again. Now if Leno would hurry up and come on already!

I got stopped by a cop today after I drove too fast, and failed to give right of way. The guy did. not. give. me. a ticket! OMGods he could have totally cashed in. And he didn't. \o/ I drove home with a huge smile on my face. Thank you, kind (and hot) cop.

So, on January 23rd, I told my lovely boss man figure (Jimbo) that I want to go into the management program, preferably by the summer, which would mean by April/May, because the course is 17 weeks, and it would span over Patrick’s Summer Break (ideal). That’s three months worth of telling his boss (Butch Girl), and interviews for me. Enough time, by any standards (I used to work with a girl who decided to go into the program and she was gone shortly after). So, to date, my manager has not mentioned that little piece of info to his boss (Butch Girl). At least not to anyone’s knowledge – people (Kurt) that would have been contacted if my name were on that list. One management course has just started, and the last one for this year is planned by April/May – the one I want to be on.

Today, I find out, through the grapevine, that they’re thinking of asking me to be a closing manager first. But as far as I know there were only talking about the possibility (Jimbo and Kurt), and none of this has to do do with my boss's boss (Butch Girl - who is the one that makes the final decision on me going to the program or not). Now, a closing manager always works from around 12 PM to 10 PM. Hence the name. A closing manager does all the duties a co-manager would do in that time slot (there aren’t many closing managers around, maybe that’s something they want to do from now on). And a closing manager’s pay is at the level of an associate manager (one step below a co-manager). Why, in the hell do they think I would go for that? Why do they think anyone would go for that? Always late shifts and then doing the work and not getting paid for it? Are you kidding me?

My aforementioned lovely boss man figure (Jimbo) is in a pickle right now. His associate manager is out sick and will be out sick for an unforeseeable time, and one of his co-managers is itching to transfer to another store. He probably thinks that I would take over as a closing manager in his store and then all his little problems would be solved. Only, he doesn’t realize that if he fucks with my chances to advance in this company the way I want to, he’s going to be short a certain GM Manager or closing manager (your's truly). There’s no way I’m hanging around this douche bag (Jimbo). God, I’m so mad I could scream!

alright, people. Fess up! Someone posted about the tv show Merlin on or around the 25th of January. There was a video. And maybe some recs?

Trouble is, short of going through all the people on my flist one-by-one, I can't find it anymore. skip=??? only goes right up to half a day of the 25th. Darnit!

Does anyone remember?

(I've downloaded the show, btw, and it's totally cute!)

It’s been the most gorgeous weather the last few days since the new year started, and I am at home, feeling all blah with an abscessed tooth and a swollen cheek. Life is so unfair. I’ve had the balcony door open all day, and my neighbor’s wind chimes have been chiming in the wind, and OMG I wish I could leave the house for just a little while because it is just that nice out. But not while there are other people on this planet that could see me with my “new face.” I kindly asked my neighbor to go to the store for me today to pick up a few things for me, and luckily she did without laughing at me.
What really aggravates me is that I had to call in sick today, and will have to call in sick again tomorrow (unless, through a sheer miracle, my cheek deflates to its normal size overnight). I hate missing work. Even if it is the weekend.
So I have nothing to show for this weekend, besides illegally downloading movies and tv shows, watching The Lake House on Oxygen, and being on a strict diet of antibiotics, pain meds, echinacea, yogurt, bananas and water. I’m afraid of solid food, because that’s what got me into this in the first place.

Every once in a while – about every three months or so – I have this one night of insomnia. There’s no way that I can fall asleep no matter how hard I try. And I try: warm milk, the couch in my living room, old tv shows, what have you…
Well, last night was one of those nights. The last one before that was at the beginning of December. So I read a little slash, and watched eight episodes of The Big Bang Theory, the ILU, RM video about a million times, and otherwise stayed the hell away from LJ, in fear of updating every time the clock hit a full hour. And I was super on time this morning for work, and I had enough time to take a bath, even, and my hair looked really cute. It does have its upsides, you know.
So now it’s three thirty and I’m home. And I really don’t want to sleep the rest of the day and the entire night away. I may make it through nine PM and then crash. Or, after eating “lunch”, I may just fall into a metabolism-induced coma. We shall see.

On my to-do list today is getting new tires for the car and an alignment. Someone please motivate me.

I stayed home on Friday (Charles was sick), and actually watched BSG on my tv (instead of a torrent on Monday, as I usually do), ( and )
On Saturday, we went to an art show by Daniel Padilla, which was really great. Too bad that every single piece of art shown was more expensive than my couch.
And last night, for Super Bowl, Patrick and I got invited to a party at a friend of a friend’s house. Tons of people, great, GREAT food, and the most gorgeous house ever! Too bad it got chilly when the sun went down, I could have sat in that backyard forever.  They were completely serious about the game, too, with a betting pool and everything. And when Springsteen came on, everybody in the livingroom sang along.

Also, fantastic clip from "The State Of The Union" from The Spotlight Cabaret, ( I Love You, Rachel Maddow )

I should be asleep. It’s icing outside, and I dare not share the road tomorrow with hundreds of people that have no business being on the road when it’s icing. I’m shooting for leaving the house super early. Or not at all. [ETA (5:54 AM) I tried, I really did, but it's just too icy. I had trouble getting out of the apartment complex, for crying out loud. I turned around once I was on the proper street. And when I came back down the hill, a little yellow mazda came up the hill, trying, too, and when I parked the car and got out, I saw that mazda parking her ass right back in her parking spot. She declared defeat, just like me. It's supposed to thaw by noon, so I might go in then, or I might just call it quits and go in tomorrow, on my off-day.]

Last Friday Charles invited me to go to the Grove Awards with him in Pleasant Grove. It’s a small, crime-ridden community in south Dallas, and the awards were for things like Best Volunteer, Best Neighborhood Watch, Best Humanitarian. It was completely awesome. Much better than I expected. We had a great time.
On Saturday it was so cold outside that I called Charles and told him that unless there’s something bigger going on than our usual coffee drinking/cruising people at the coffee shop, I wasn’t going to come down to Dallas. Well, it was a friend’s surprise birthday party, so of course I went. Now, we all know this, but let me say it again, for the record: leave it to gay people to throw fabulous parties. I wish I hadn’t eaten at home (I was unclear about the dinner plans at that point) because there was so much great food at the party. There were tons of balloons bobbing at the ceiling, confetti on every surface, great music (although I think the host of the party was a bit of a music nazi, bless him), and great people (most of which were flight attendants – the birthday boy is one, too). And of course we all sucked the helium out of the balloons to entertain ourselves at some point. I hadn’t done that in a long time.
Oh, and also on Friday, I made it official and told my boss that I want to enter the management program. He said he’d definitely recommend me, and that he thinks I’d be awesome as a co manager. \o/ There will be interviews now. Lots of interviews. It’s like applying for a whole new job.

Michelle

Clearly, I don't need another show to watch. If it weren't for the internet and TiVo, I wouldn't be able to watch or plan to watch the shows I want. But this show is awesome. It's geeky and sarcastic. I love it.



Bones! Why do you have to be the same night as SPN. Why do you have to air two new shows? Bah.

All the while people are poking fun at W. for finally moving (he started packing, apparently) out of the White House (no, there's no sign up sheet to volunteer to help), locals are up in arms about him moving in. God save us all. Good thing is that he's such a public figure, so chances are he'll hardly leave his four walls, but his wife is such a social butterfly that, you know, she sure will stop traffic once in a while. Word in the news is that he's requested a security gate be put at the end of the street of his new residence. It's apparently unclear if he's moving to the cul-de-sac, or to the street proper. Cul-de-sac, no problem, but on a public street? Not a chance in hell, George. No matter how famous or wealthy your neighbors are (who'd love the gate just as much as you), I believe the city cannot do that. I'm all for locking him in and throwing away the keys, if you ask me.

Another housing crisis in Washington is apparently Obama's. I don't know if it's regular news (I get my news from Rachel Maddow these days), but The White House people have denied Obama and his family the use of the guest house for the time of his stay in Washington before he moves into the White House. And Rachel is having a field day with this, every day. It's highly amusing. Apparently, the former Prime MInister of Australia is staying at the Blair House for one single night to get some sort of Freedom Medal awarded by Bush. And he's staying alone there with his wife, in a four townhome mansion. And the Obamas are staying in a hotel. How funny!!

I don't know if TPTB could have thought of anything else to put on my plate today, because everything happened! Major remodel going on (hello, beer and wine), P&G tested us (and we failed with flying colors), hole count (could have been better OMG), promo reset (Valentine's Day is only 39 days away - and isn't it just fucking depressing to put this shit up when you just had your heart broken?), and big wigs in suits at 4PM.

I shall watch Rachel Maddow now, because she always cheers me up, and fall asleep ten minutes before her show is over because I always do that. No stamina, people, and especially not after a day like today.

Happy New Year, folks!

I’ve been in a very strange mood lately. And I absolutely don’t like myself like this. I’m constantly close to tears, there’s some days where I have a smile on my face, but those are few and far in between. Maybe it’s a mid-life crisis. And how unfortunate, because didn’t those go out of style in the late 80ies? I feel very isolated, and very apart from anyone. I have the need to constantly surround myself with as many people as possible, I hate having a day off work, and I hate being left to my own devices. Because then I just start thinking too much, and, yeah, that’s when it all goes downhill. 

All around me life is moving on, and I just feel as if I missed the train or something. Of course that’s bullshit, because I live plenty, but lately it hasn’t been as satisfying as it used to be. My sister has two children now, and my cousin Mark is becoming a daddy in a couple of days, and here I am, living the same life day in and out, and I don’t even remember ever knowing these people. Co-workers are also moving on, going into the management program, and I feel like saying, but what about me? I’ve thought about going, too, and I’ve been encouraged by management to do so, but I think Patrick is still too young for me to have a completely unstable work schedule and hardly any days off. But I still feel left out, feel as if I’m maybe settling (even if it’s just for the moment) with something that I don’t really want anymore.

I have this big old crush on this girl. It was bliss for a while there, and even if there was some frustration I felt at the beginning, I now feel that frustration ten fold, because she just up and took all that bliss away from me without as much as an explanation. I fell pretty hard, and there was nobody there to catch me, and it hurt like a bitch (still does), because I don’t have the closure that I so desperately crave. It all sucks very hard.

God, this shit is so depressing, and I probably will delete this in the near future, because who wants to have a dud like this sitting in their journal? But there it is, and typing it out and “talking” about it maybe has some positive motivational effect on me.

Looking back on 2008, all I can see is that failed almost relationship, weeks and weeks of working (I have not missed a single day of work last year) and nothing to show for it. Even a short trip to Chicago and that week in Houston (both of which were fun), and the outcome of the elections, don’t outshine that horrible December.

So, today, while sitting at the coffee shop with Charles and Samuel, I thought that this year, I want t accomplish something. Something that I can look back on the next New Years Day with pride. I have no clue what, but something life altering needs to happen. I like my job, and I’m not thinking about quitting at all, but something needs to change. And dating is so out of the question right now it’s not even funny, but maybe sometime this year somebody will catch my eye.

Time for a game. Stolen from kaycee_a (cause hers got me in the mood), but seen everywhere lately.

1. Put your ipod (mp3 player/iTunes/whatever) on shuffle.
2. For 25 songs, post the first line from the song that plays, no matter how embarrassing.
3. Let people guess what the songs are. The lyrics will be striked when someone guesses it.
4. Looking up lyrics to stuff is not allowed.



1. So she said what's the problem, baby, what's the problem I don't know c_lady
2. Baby, you've been going so crazy, lately nothing seems to be going right.
3. When the moonlights crawls a long the street, chasing away the summer heat crooked_halo8
4. Can you hear me, does anyone around me feel the way that I feel now
5. How do I get closer to you when you keep it all on mute
6. I never understood before I never knew what love was for
7. I hope you hang yourself with your H&M scarf while jacking off listening to Mozart
8. Girl, I'm in love with you, this ain't the honey moon, past the infatuation phase
9. I feel so unsure as I take your hand and lead you to the dancefloor kaycee_a
10. Have I been sleeping, I've been so still, afraid of crumbling
11. Is it so hard to satisfy your senses velvetaj
12. I'm so cool, too bad I'm a loser, I'm so smart, too bad I can't get anything figured out
13. Her face is a map of the world, is a map of the world kaycee_a
14. First I was afraid, I was petrified kaycee_a
15. It's a God awful small affair, to the girl with the mousy hair
16. Easy, ready, willing, overtime, where does it stop where do you dare me to draw the line
17. When a single mom goes out on a date with somebody new it always winds up being more like a job interview incredulity
18. Come to me now lay your hands over me c_lady
19. Looking for some education, made my way into the night crooked_halo8
20. I touch the tongue to see a devils face in front of me
21. I know you're home, you left your light on firelily
22. Voted most likely to end up on the back of a milk box drink
23. Go ahead as your waste your days with thinking, when you fall everyone sins c_lady
24. The faster we're falling we're stopping and stalling
25. It starts with one thing I don't know why it doesn't even matter how hard we try jewelianna


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There are not enough hours in a day. Holy Hell. I'm in the middle of a very stressful two weeks, which, thank God, will end in an awesome long weekend in Chicago.

I'm trying to get the house clean and ship shape for Michelle's visit, all the while trying to juggle OMG so much work at work, stupidly scheduled meetings (come on, 3 PM on the very other site of the county south of here!!! I hate you, corporate!). And since I'm having a short week next week, I'm trying to cram as much working hours into four days that I'm beginning to think, why come down here, Michelle, because we'll hardly be seeing each other. But! After all of that, I get to see pretty people!!!! I'm so excited I can't stand it. November is REALLY shaping up to kill me with exhaustion and at the same time being The Best Month Ever. Which brings me to last night.

I went to the Dallas County Democratic Party's block party. And it was an amazing night. Aside from the obvious good news, it was an absoloutely pleasant night all around. People we in such a great mood, friendy to, and striking up conversation with, practical strangers, and all that police force was much appreciated, but seriously not needed.

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Happy Halloween!!

This year, Patrick (and I) went with his friends Michael and Andrew to their grandma's neighborhood. Gigantic neighborhood. Huge! We walked around for two hours, and didn't even get to go to all the houses, because, a) Andrew had to pee, and b) Patrick's two buckets were filled to the brim. One house gave out fresh cotton candy OMG so delicious!! That was the only place where I couldn't resist. Hmmm.

( pictures )